The Further Adventures of Captain SQL!!!!!!!

Starting work in a week on TheBigIron, right back where I started from 2.5 years ago.

I'm back, baby!

Labels: Baggage, Bitchslapped, full screen editors are for losers, single line editors are for men, techwhining

and so far so good.  Girlfriend was with me this weekend, and no bad scene.  Beginning to look around for work, and haven't gone broke so far.  Was at a VP Debate party with local Repubs last week. Lotsa fun watching BiteMe go nuts, as expected.  Finances look OK enough that I could slack off to plans C or even D jobwise, if needed.  Still want to be CaptainSQL.  Anyways, it is good to have my ass out of the heart attack machine.

Labels: Babe Magnet, Baggage, Bitchslapped, Blogging, Football, Kumbiyah

Stardate 4 days after going over the hill:

Tired as shit of this I-71 commute.  Job blows big time and expect and hope for it to end middle of year.  This shuttle between house and job every other weekend is a big pain in the ass.  Want to do normal things on my normal property which is mine, again.

Labels: Baggage, Bitchslapped, Blogging

Yep, still here, still hitting I-71 frequently. Job no longer worth it in any way. A year and a half after the bait and switch and massive cheapness on my part means I won't be living in a packing crate if they send me packing. Still the Captain of the SQL. For what it's worth.

Labels: Bitchslapped, techwhining

Work in Columbus continues at levels of Suckitude not seen since the first three weeks of the Benjamin Harrison administration. I’m damn glad I’m turning 60 this year and can see the finish line for work as we know it within crawling distance, at least close enough to get my ass back up I-71 to the friendly confines of Cleveland, Ohio. And by that I mean the East Side proper, not the lilly-white stronghold of Erin O’Brien, as if any of color or Hebritude would venture into her vicinity West of the Cuyahoga. That is Injun Territory by the Treaty of Greenville, and give it back, I say.

My daughter is in the middle of her Junior year at Yeshiva U., merrily wrecking curves in Organic Chemistry and making our very own Princessi sad in the process. Even as I sit here watching a godawfull college bowel game I am filled with the intense wrath toward my employer that kindles the types of Mighty Oaths that only a talent of Acidman grade talent, or at least V-Man grade can adequately express.

Is any of this writing OK, or what?

Anyhoo, as said previously, hate the job, like Columbus, staying sober, kid doing well. And am looking for work back in Cleveland. Actually had interviews in person, after looking for about a year, so that is good. Worst case, to quote Mark Schaumberg, “There are few problems that can’t be solved by a clock tower and a high powered rifle”. I believe I can do the construction near the office, but may need to enlist local talent such as Redneck to assist with the ballistics.

Hope your year is looking up. If not, start construction on that clock tower.

Labels: Bitchslapped, Blogging, techwhining

Happy Thanksgiving!

Back is largely better, but with this holiday followed closely seeing my daughter immediately followed by two weeks of testing hell, I'm babying it along slowly. Lots of anti-inflammatory meds, ice, and as much rest as possible. And stretching. The back that is, not necessarily the truth. I'll leave the latter to the professionals.

Things sure have changed a lot since Labor Day. I'm pretty far from the world of database on the job, astray in the stupid and rashly assigned world of writing test scripts. The bitch of it is nobody is stupid or lazy. It was just a sudden, rash management decision to switch assignments. When I get into an ill defined, undocumented assignment, I cannot help but want to complete it successfully. I can't seem to help it, but this time I don't take it home and worry about it all day and night, like when it first hit. Basically, I don't care much for writing test scripts and need to find another job. And while I'm at it, get one where I can come home to my house at night.

Time to meet the potential son-in-law in the flesh, he of the Hoosier persuasion. Also plan to see the lovely and talented Erica whilst in NYC. Then, like I said, go face down in heavy duty (doody?) testing for two fucking weeks.

Have started to read again. Finished up an autobiography of Eddie Rickenbacker while babysitting a production install. A decent read, and an amazing life. Thomas Edison and Sgt. York rolled into one. Now reading The Book of Lights by Chiam Potok. A much thicker, slower read.

Will have Thanksgiving at a friend's house in Bustown tomorrow. Overall, was going to start up meeting people in Bustown in October, but between being pissed off about work then wrenching my back I wonder if it's worth it. Overall, need to be back at the Fortress of Database Excellence about every other weekend, and next big objective is to shitcan this shitcan of a job an get one in my hometown. I get together with friends in Cleveland when I'm up there, and haunt the regular Martini bar then. Overall, making the best of a mediocre situation.

Anyway, enjoy the turkey, stuffing and assorte pies.

The annual beatdown of MeatChicken is coming up Saturday.

Labels: Baggage, Bitchslapped, Football, full screen editors are for losers, Martinis, techwhining

Labels: Bitchslapped, techwhining

was on the sweatshirt of the friend that greeted me last night. It was guy's night at the movies, where I enjoyed The Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, something I hadn't done in a long time. For an even longer time I hadn't seen a movie that was so thought provoking. Very refreshing. The guy's son got him the sweatshirt. Didn't know that he and son were big Ayn Rand fans. So is my daughter. Good to meet real live people who can actually think, 'specially in extremely blue climes.

The last week has been badly laid up on meds due to really bad back pain. Had something this bad four years ago. Steroids applied, and will follow up Monday. Much mobility is back but standing is really wobbly. I gotta get to the bottom of this.

Anybody know if getting up early every morning and kicking hippies is good exercise?

OSU stomp of Gophers tonight at Chammps.

Labels: Bitchslapped, Good Movies, Kumbiyah

Work is still a bitch. I am still performing amazing acts of SQL greatness on spare time, while doing other shit a damn lot of the time. Very tired at the end of the week. Actually feel a lot better once I leave the place. Given the short horizon of my likely time left in the exciting world of technology, and that the place where I work likes to reorg and RIF, doesn't make sense to hit the road every weekend. It was fun up to a couple of months ago, so time to look for work closer to home.

Did meet an interesting gal down there. Claims to be friends with Jimmy Johnson. He's a race car driver, right? Also had Archie Griffin over for dinner a few times. You heard me right, you SEC guys. The ONE AND ONLY DOUBLE HEISMAN WINNER. Read 'em and weep.

The only upside of this shit work is that I am now a lot more proficient in two other technologies.

Labels: Babe Magnet, Baggage, Bitchslapped, Football, full screen editors are for losers, techwhining

End of the daughter's summer program this afternoon, wating for the big show in a couple of hours. Ex in tow, recent ex girlfriend possibly there too. Many years later, still have to take it easy.

Been taking it easy for 4 months. Two weeks from now to dropoff at college. Signed up for fantasy football, but experience has shown you can't beat the pros in evaluating a draft strategy.

Labels: Bitchslapped, Football, Music, Psychotic Ex

Labels: Bitchslapped, Kumbiyah

Rough week. Headcutcount Friday at work. Not my department, but some guys I worked with for a long time. We knew these would be coming, but it still sux. Wrapped up the post-graduation hoohah with the school in a busy as hell Monday and Tuesday with the assistance of an attorney. Lawyers. Don't leave home without them. Then Tuesday night got up from a deep sleep when my back went out. Thursday PM it was so bad that I got meds on Friday, which are working nicely, thank you very much. The weekend was better, althoug Frinite was irritating all around.

Listening to Creedence CR now. It fits.

Up next, nurse the back back to health, drop off the kid at college. Then get cracking on recovery from latest girlfriend. Then simultaneously get serious about putting points on the board on the backup technlogy, for any possible job hunt.

Labels: Bitchslapped, Music, techwhining

More post-graduation shizz, and gal I've been seeing is incommunicable. I am grumpy. This cheers me up.

Labels: Bitchslapped

Namely, ABC by putting The Goode Family on Friday at 8:30 PM. That moves my precious drinking adult time this summer about 1 - 1.5 hours later at the MartiniBar. A less fun, more surly crowd arrives then, just full of piss and vinegar to slam the counter and proclaim fealty to The One and to the Democrat Party of Cuyahoga County. That's Cuyahoga, with a hog. In particular, Commissoner Jimmy DiMora. As the hog. Like there's another party to vote for here.

This may make it easier to cope. Not the song. The scene.

Labels: Bitchslapped, King of the Hill, Kumbiyah, Martinis

One of the great things about being older is that every fail isn't the end of the world. Take this weekend. Please. Thursnite started out nice. Both sisters were over, without even more Goode Family like relatives attached. Middlesis was zonked out from work, littlesis from her trip in from ChiTown. Overall, it was nice. My daughter enjoyed it too. I think. And so it looked like the first post-graduation week was wrapping up nicely. And with a surplus of pizza in the fridge that is still feeding me. Only Friday to get through, so what could go wrong?

Pick up my daughter from a Clinic seminar Friday afternoon. This should have been a nice break from work, and a chance to shmooze with other kids in the program. She was tense, and pouty, so I knew something was up. About halfway home she spills the beans. Spoiler Alert for several cheezy teen movies, and many adults recurring nightmares.

As background, this girl worked her tushy off last year doubling up on courses so she could finish High School a year early, because she wanted a more religious life at a top university. And she toally did that. She accomplished her goal. The school administration for the most part was wonderfully supportive. Actually, they got back to us same day. You won't even get that service when paying bigh $$$$ to private industry, so these top guys at the school deserve a lot of credit, and I give them that recognition.

Only one presented any obstacle to her doing early grauation. One guidance counsellor really seemed to have a bone in her throat about this. If only it was a literal bone in the throat! Anyways, long story short, my daughter accomplishes what she needs at school and the Principal verifies she has the credits. In fact, he ordered her diploma two weeks even before I asked him is she could participate in gruaduation! He deserves a lot of kudos for this!

So graduation was a week ago last Thursday. The Superintendant certified that all participating had met graduation requirements. Everything was above board. And we had a great time and lived happily ever after.

Until yesterday afternoon. The "Guidance Office" called my kid and told her she needed wait for it.... an extra half credit to graduate. I put this in the category of bullshit. This girl's progress for the last year has been totally under the microscope. She gave up being Valedictorian in 2010, and all the ceremonial graduation honors to meet her objective. All the free time she sacrificed could have gone to more activities, or more competitions, or a job, or learning to drive, or just hanging out and being a kid.

So I wonder if this strange audit of her transcript was a going away gift from the Counsellor. This woman will not be a Counsellor next year. She was demoted to proctoring online classes for the kids at one of the districts "alternative" High Schools. Which means she is Vice President of Sitting By The Door. I heard she made a lot of inappropriate remarks to students in the last couple of years and all my kid's teachers seemed to be on to her. I never complained about her because the administration bigshots have been great guys. But this kind of review one week after the diplomas were certified seems strange.

Isn't that the way of the petty tyrant? The misplaced paperwork. The "misunderstanding". The arms crossed "This is our policy. We know it runs counter to the rules. And maybe the law. But what are you going to do? Huh?" attitude Americans have come to know and loathe so much.

And of course they dumped this on my kids on a Friday afternoon, when she couldn't do anything about it but get burned up. It burned me up plenty. Who the fuck goes over already certified diplomas once kids have graduated?

More fail today. Girlfriend was going to see Land of the Lost with me, but has a sick dog. With all the crap yesterday I don't know if I would have been the best company today. So I head out to the other side of town to go to a techie picnic which is on some church grounds. I gets there, and find myself almost crashing some Eastern Orthodox wedding.

Is it Monday yet?

Labels: Babe Magnet, Bitchslapped, King of the Hill, Kumbiyah, techwhining

About to sign off for a while, so this baby ought to keep you occupied until I can release my next log gem. The CaptainSQL PC is all crapped up, which is what you get when you use inferior GUI based software instead of the true value of line edits, as was meant by G-D. So enjoy this bit of pie.

Just told the asshole going door to door the try to generate interest in the local newsdaily to get the F off'n my property. Die, MSM, die!

Labels: Bitchslapped, full screen editors are for losers, Music, single line editors are for men, techwhining

Unless you are Jimmy Dimora, in which case you are a pirate. One with his fat face stuck in a box of doughnuts. Don't like to blog politics much. Many do it much better. Also, in Cleveland, it's a lost cause. We re-elect sleazewads like Dimora, Hagan, Christine McMonagle et. al. because we love 'em. At least those remaining in this county. Most sensible and employed people are hitting the county line PDQ fast. It is also long since past when any liberal has anything to say to me about any bigger issues too. If they do, they need to refer to the behavior of my ex-wife's congregation as given in these blog archives.

A quick and hopefully not shameful game vs. Troy State, wherever that is, then it's off the The Big 10 for the Bucks. The chance for us to humiliate MeatChicken gives hope to life, as we know it. Braylon Edwards not contributing to The Browns. That's a UM grad, for ya. Also, with The Big 10 Network blackout tomorrow I will be forced to watch some decent SEC games.

The Vermillion trip was nice. Always nice to be on the water this time of year. Waiting for leaves to fall. Fall, leaves, fall. Defoliation of the back yard occurred yesterday when the hedge came down. I still have some stubble to clear this weekend, then it gets planted with a nice layer of grass. Really enjoying the wide open spaces now!

My daughter is theoreitically here this weekend, but spending Shabbos with a more observant family nearby. It seems like it's been a year since I last saw her! College application underway, so she may be gone to NYC this time next year. Sounds like a good excuse to visit, and barge in on the local bloggers. Always on the lookout for convenient corn storage. Hey, this address on Chauncey Street looks promising.

I did screw up lately, tho. Will be going to a Maria Muldaur concert next weekend, but didn't know how big a leftie she is. Can't back out of this one, so guess I'll have to send my camel to bed and bite the bullet. Some deserving cause will get some of my guilt gelt, tho. On the positive side, I do see that some of the ranters on Cleveland.com are on to McMonagle, or more likely have also been screwed big time by her.

Labels: Babe Magnet, Bitchslapped, Blogging, Football, Kumbiyah, Psychotic Ex

Enjoying on-call this weekend. How so, you ask. Been doing this technonlogy for manymanymany years. I've been at a roll-over-and-mumble-into-the-phone-at 3:30 AM then go back to sleep level of proficiency for fixing problems for a long long time. But the advanced technology of the future demands a different technology to be the advanced technology of the future and I've got too many years into that future to thrown in the towell and go back to the car wash. Get it, towell, car wash? Anyways, now's a good time as any to get on board the singlelineeditor express, and prepare for a life of prodigious cursing at said 3:30 AM, and other times.

Also, being on-call keeps me safe at home. Hillary is infesting the local high school. I hope they thoroughly decontaminate before my daughter goes back to class next week.

Labels: Bitchslapped, full screen editors are for losers, Kumbiyah, single line editors are for men, techwhining

It's my blogaversary! All hail to CaptainSQL!!!!!!! Tower of SQL coding excellence in an ever-downgrading pointy/clicky world! Titan of Tuning, Maharajah of Metadata! King of Code Reviews. OK, that last one was a stretch.

Four years of blogging excellence, taking on Nimrod Project Managers and sea-hag friends of the ex-wife alike. And it's gone so fast too! It's like it was almost yesterday!

Still on call, doing my on-call flawlessly. As expected. Saw my requisite chick-flick (27 Dresses) last night. Boy, the things guys do to impress! Need a dose of Hank Hill more than ever now. But just when you need that pick-me-up life picks you up, then gives you one straight to the snotlocker! The Clintoons are on the loose locally. They figures this is Clintoon country and they are right. Phooey! The local schoolmarm summonsed all the townsfolk for a big rah-rah rally when Hillary comes here to tell us how to think and when. Indeed, nothing brings on that uneasy, sleazy, cheezy feeling like a Clinton! I plan to avoid her in droves!

Labels: Babe Magnet, Bad Movies, Bitchslapped, Blogging, dang grammar, King of the Hill, Kumbiyah, Psychotic Ex, techwhining

Met with the ex last Thursday about the one big legal hoohah relating to our daughter. It turns out this is not going to be more drama. In fact, it's not an issue at all. This is very good. Most importantly, it's good for our kid to finally be out of the legal toing and froing. Also very much easier on Captain SQL's nerves.

That doesn't let any of the ex's enablers off the hookah, in my mind. It's bigger than that. Those people built and supported the drama and shizzle that has been a plague for the last 12 years and aren't under the nice protection of the Parenting Agreement, so unlike the ex, they're targets. My daughter has already discovered how full of shit most of these people are. Of course there's alienation. You can't be force fed a diet of that BS your entire life and not have it.

And that brings us to the subject of (yecch) politics. The non-execution of the laws that that protect against parental alienation were and are not a mistake. Moses didn't bring 'em down from Mt. Sinai, and I'm pretty sure Jesus and Bhudda didn't provide 'em either. Yes, it's human beings, or, alternatively the weepy-pie social workers and Domestic Relations judges that have implemented this (as opposed to real humans). The same is true all over. Witness what happened to Acidman before he died. Look at the crap Rudy Giuliani is getting. Of course his kids are distant. They've been encouraged to view him as the enemy every step of the way. It is a tennant of the Democrat Party here and across the country, Man bad/Woman victim/good. They built it. They love it. They live by it. Now I'm deeply into this rant, and have to say that they and their candidates all have the stink of parental alienation on them. So don't expect me to be voting for them soon. Also, it seems that a lot of them have a deep shame at being an American. It don't share that, and don't want anything to do with it or them.

End of Rant.

Labels: Bitchslapped, Blogging, Kumbiyah, Psychotic Ex