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Friday, May 30, 2008

Last weekend of this godawful on-call doubledose. It's also my daughter's Prom night. She and the young man depart from her mom's place, and she returns here. Relatively little threatening needed on this one. He's going to Ohio U. to study film, so pretty easy to intimidate. No need to haul out the hardware. A large bottle of gun oil prominently placed did the trick. Also, the ex is a lot scarier. Anyway, it looks like another all nighter for me, either or both ways.

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Tuesday, May 27, 2008

This Blog is 


Now under CONELRAD control. For the next 60 seconds, and all time thereafter, ignore the flatulent bleatings of Jimmy Carter.

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Not (physically) sick after all, but still had that uneasy, queasy feeling yesterday as I expertly guided Production Control through one of their hardware failures. That's me, CaptainSQL, safeguarding our data integrity one floperino at a time.

Is it just me, or do the recent antics of Hussein and FatChick (Obama and Hillary) belong on Photshop? Wanna say everybody between the coast is a bitter clinger, then deny you ever said it? Poof! It's magic. And the true believers will believe it, truly. An uncle liberated Auschwitz, which would have put him in the Soviet Army, but claim he was in the U. S. Army in WWII? No problem there. Hillary under sniper fire. Sure.

Wake me when it's all over.

Anyway, don't worry because Herbert T. Gillis is in command!

Too much exposure to Dobie Gillis explains my babe magnitude.

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Monday, May 26, 2008

Nothing like ending a holiay weekend on-call with a touch of the flu, which feels like I have now. It could be on-call, also. 50% through my doubleweek, and pretty much spend the weekend recovering from the recovery last Thursday. Also, following the lead of Glenn Close, Natasha Fatale left a message on my answering machine. Since I already posted The Eagles Take It Easy a while ago, here's my best angry woman hiding out from music besides that:


Gilligan! And this was a good six years before Pure Prarie League, too.

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Sunday, May 25, 2008


Still on call. Weekend has been better, but not much time to post. Here is my Memorial Day posting:


In Memorium
Have you ever looked, really looked, at a soldier's face? Sometimes it's young, barely
an adult the hopes of youth still painted in its features. Sometimes it's old older
than faith, older than wisdom, older than time. And sometimes...sometimes it's a bit
of both all at once.


Sometimes it's gritty and pained, remembering the face of another who has fallen.
Sometimes it's laughing, pleased to have a moment of peace. Most of the time it's
proud because it knows, oh yes it knows, the world is a different place a
better place because of it.


Next time you look at a soldier's face, see if you can find that glint of pride.
Sometimes it’s hidden, and you have to search it out. You'll find it in the eyes always
in the eyes. For the eyes are indeed the windows to the soul, even a soldier's
soul.


And when you've carefully examined every feature of that soldier's face, stand up
straight and tall and smile your best smile. Thank that soldier, because it does what
some cannot or will not. It defends what it believes to be right with it's very life.


But more important, it defends a perfect stranger you.
And when you see a flag covered casket, stand in memorium of all the soldier's faces
you've examined. For when one of them falls, they all fall. And when one of them
stands, they all stand.


Shouldn't we stand with them?


Lilian Leader
June 2, 2006

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Friday, May 23, 2008

Now going real slow after an all-nighter fixing big time Database problems on my birthday. Not fun. Still holding down the fort this weekend, next week, and next weekend. After that Martinis, and how!

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Monday, May 19, 2008

I feel my pain 

Double dose of on-call, this week and next. Not much else is going to happen then. More slowdowns for getting stuff done around the house.

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Sunday, May 18, 2008

Seen in the CaptainSQL Library 

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Saturday, May 17, 2008

Defrag It! 

Defragging's done for the weekend. Now for PPL tonight:

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I can't beat this posting by Neo-Neocon. That's why I don't post much on politics: others do it much better. Also, I never got past not having a rhyme for orange.

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Friday, May 16, 2008

Tiring week doing the work of high level database design. Capped off with a rah-rah meeting for the latest bullshizzle. Descending into the dark on-call world the next couple of weeks, so I won't be aided by my trusty Indian sidekick, Martinis very much. Then I transfer into primary parenting mode in June as the summer slinks in.

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Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Heaviest duty effort at work in several years, keeping the crazies in line, mostly in my department. After many, many years of reliable database administration some of these weisenheimers decide to become big time operators. You know you're in trouble when you start believing your own hype! Also jettisoned the Russian gal. Must devote time to technical tasks at hand. And mostly avoiding too much sarcasm on the job. That's what this outlet is for.

Also, that's what martinis were created for. And I've been medicating heavily.

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Sunday, May 11, 2008

OK. This is funnier

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Sunday Upd8 

As the invasion of texting grammar invades the CaptianSQL blog. Relationship with the current gal in low orbit, about to hit earth soon. Clear the area. I sure could use relationship help. Too bad The Man Show is off the air. I will follow the wise advise from wise guys in the previous posting.

Next week will be spent bravely weasling my way around sayng "gee, your idea really blows" in a polite, courteous and positive manner. And then go forward with a logical alternatives analysis. Darn that logic.

Chitown sister says I could have a big future as a sarcastic proofreader. Is that true? On a scale of 0 to G.M. Roper ripping on Hillary, how do I rate on the SarcasToMeter? What about the ratio of cynical to sarcastic comments? Has that changed? How so?

At least I have the comfort of a successful kitchen paint touch-up under my belt before heading into the salt mines tomorrow. That an a big, sloppy burger with grilled onions and hash browns from the local diner. Take that, food police! Also, it gives me about two hours betewen this posting and King of the Hill to watch the paint dry. Yay!

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Saturday, May 10, 2008

Saturday Afternoon Blogging 

Another fine Saturday afternoon, wasteage after car repairs and a haricut. Kim Novak still hanging out at the barber shop. A fine spring day here by the shores of Lake Erie. Enjoy spring here, both weeks of it. Not too many bugs out yet.

Ran into my sister at the garage. We yakked for a while. Not too much Kumbiyah this time. Called little sister in Chicago and chewed the fat. She advised me the next big technology will be manual. Like abacusesses (abicaii?) and what not. OK then. Back to unicorns and butterflys in the City of Big Shoulders.

Work continues to be the struggle to move to the advanced space age technology of the future. Ya know, it's not a question of logic, cost, benefit, or ease of use. It's a matter of FAITH. The technology that has been chosen will be the technlogy of the future. So it has been written. So let it be done. Those with strategic vision has spoken. In the meantime I think I have successfully dodged Project Management. I sure hope so. If not, I will fall back on this reliable advice:

Of course, we've got our own zealots in my DBMS world. Particularly them hotshots that jump from flimsy concept to coding in one move. Also those driving their chopper through the office shooting up anything developed before they showed up on the scene. Assbags.

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Wednesday, May 07, 2008

Marc Dann Doesn't Measure Up 

again.


Well, how 'bout it Marc? And when are you going to load the Solon and Orange mayor into the slammer for participating in Operation Chaos? Huh? We're waiting.

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Today a CaptainSQL technical breakthrough kludge that even impresses me! It's so damn good I'm going to lapse into a totally different language to butcher the grammar.

Hic, Haec, Hoc
Hujus, Hujus, Hujus.

Heus!

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Sunday, May 04, 2008

I'm Gonna Switch to This Shul 

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Saturday, May 03, 2008

And this, for good measure 

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Can We Play Now Too? 

OK, here's Ohio's best, so far:

http://blog.cleveland.com/plaindealer/2008/05/gov_strickland_on_attorney_gen.html

Now can we please get bigtime notice for a sex scandal? Pleeease? I mean, we're doing the best we can. We did provide the nation with Jerry Springer after all. Can we play in the big leagues, like Spritzer, and that two weiners in a bun guy in Jersey?

In fairness to the local blue section crooks and also libtards in general, here's their flimsy arguments:
  1. Eve'r body duzzit (Paging Bubba)
  2. It's fer th' chirrn' (Also paging Bubba)
  3. Yeahhhh, look, over there, Rumsfeld!

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Thursday, May 01, 2008

Still reading Pynchon, and probably will for a long time. If he as any good he'd perfect time travel. Then I could fast forward to the time when I finish Against the Day.

Still seeing same gal. She's a mystery wrapped in a riddle inside an enigma. A very cute mystery. Aren't they all? Moose and squirrel must die.

Now, turning to the oldies. 42 years later, who knew Johnny Rivers was white?


So, here goes my latest version. This should have an audience of appx. 15 nationwide.

There's a man with belt and with suspenders
Avoid his stupid jokes, they are offenders
With every move he makes
Another kvetch he takes
Odds are he'll be kvetching more tomorrow.

Alta Kocker Man!
Alta Kocker Man!

They've given you a number
And told you to wait for a small rye with seeds sliced.

Well, if you out there think you can do better with your fancy verbs and nounds and objects and subjects and such, have at it!

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People won't get any smarter if you yell at them. But there's always a first time. Never forget: The performance of a new technology or concept is not important. What is important is a spiffy new acronym, and lot's of swell looking marketing.

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