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Friday, October 31, 2008

Tired today. Out of town staff meating yesterday, which wasn't big fun. Dispensed Halloweeen candy tonight. It went fast. Daughter here this weekend. Hoosierboy sez KOTH is Kaput, but I haven't been able to unearth any evidence.

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Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Cappy and PT's 



Excellent Kosher Bogus Multivariate Blogmeet. Hey, it could happen. Lonely up here on the North Coast. Lotta hippies. Too few isolated normals. Time to call a mighty Midwest get together, maybe at this location. Bring Plumber Joe too. Themes could include but not be limited to:

We'll have TBDBITL, and I'll dot the Shin.

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Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Darkness is about to descend upon the Fortress of Database Excellence in the form of rumblings from the dark side (actual business conditions) that will conjure forth the mighty and inevitable Headcut Counts. Indeed, the Counts of the Headcuts are loose upon the land, sowing fear and loathing hither and yon. I live closer to yon. Only time will tell what fate befalls our jolly and roving band of DBAs.

Meanwhile, gotta cut back on stuff like travel, not that I do much of that. Damn. The blogmeets down South always sound like fun. Maybe someday. Hey, these would be a great opportunity to test out Cappy's SureFire Project Manager Outdoor Challenge(tm). It's where we give aspiring Project Managers an outside training course, with them in full buckskin and antlers. Around this time of year. I think it could be a winner.

Having a life sure takes up a lot of time. That's what I get for getting off my flabby DBA ass and doing something.

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Sunday, October 26, 2008

Summer, Southern Ohio, Early '70's. 

Goodbye to all this, for a while.



Also, don't know how I got this:
What Football Team Are You !
Your Result: Bears
 

Fun and Basic and strong. Keep it Basic and easy. You had great years in the past and you are happy now never mad about life just take what if gives you, and deal the cards and play.

Saints
 
Eagles
 
Falcons
 
Colts
 
Browns
 
Patriots
 
Cowboys
 
What Football Team Are You !
Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

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CaptainSQL Meets The Normal People 

I sought them out, and this delivered a really nice weekend. I needed this to knock the Kumbiyah away. Yesterday, Pizza and a movie in the company of a normal babe. Didn't like Iron Man that much though. Overhyped. Dragged along in the middle. Paltrow was wearing too much clothes. Had a nice long talk with an old friend from many years ago that now lives out of town.

The only bad thing was OSU's score yesterday. JoPa. Bah!

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Saturday, October 25, 2008

This is Why Joe The Plumber Counts 

This is why.

It is because individuals with access to Ohio Government accounts, working on accounts paid for by Ohioans, on our time are researching for intimidation of this private citizen.

These agencies are the Ohio Attorney General's office and the Cuyahoga County (Child Support) Support Enforcement Agency. These individuals are performing these acts for the benefit of Barack Hussein Obama. They could do this to any individual, for Hussein's benefit, or for the benefit of their political agendas.

Through my many rants oh, no, here he goes again! I have railed against corrupt Judge Christine McMonagle. How can one depend on a judge such as her to put forward decisions that were not riddled with her whims, to be enforced with bias and brutality by agencies such as these? What would prevent these agencies from performing the same character assassination against me that they are performing against Joe The Plumber? I still have time on Child Support and until and possibly after then any glitch, mistake, or deliberate sabotage of my account could result in a criminal indictment. Why else would the Attorney General research Joe the Plumber except for trumping up charges against him.

What due process is there or could there be against this for Joe, or me, or anyone else in Ohio, particularly in the diseased jurisdiction of judges like McMonagle? What would prevent a legal onslaught of spurious charges against him, to run indefinitely, as punishment for a simple disagreement.

The Hussein campaign issues it's routine flannelmouthed denial of any connection to acts such as these. Maybe there isn't a direct connection to the campaign. But in Cleveland, and apparently St. Louis too, not having the correct opinion is becoming criminalized.

This is not the America I expected.

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Thursday, October 23, 2008

Rough day in the old techtrenches today. Department completely collapsing. American DBAs won't test. Bunch o'slackers! Martinis at the best martini place in town helped mightily. Was featuring the World Series and 2001, a Space Oddysey simultaneously and at the same time. I want HAL9000/Series XZT-3 to do away with the slacker bastards. Weekend looking better with pizza and a movie on the way, all within easy walking distance of the Fortress of Database Excellence. Nice gal. Seems normal. Has a son in the Marines and I respect that. Anyways, the best bagel and best pizza place in town also in same walking distance along the same route. Hot Damn! I passed the bagel place (Bialy's) on the way home from martinis 'cause the light was on. But it was closed.

Arrrrgh!

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Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Now A Message From... 

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Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Coming Attractions? I Hope Not. 

MR BLUE by TOM PAXTON

Good morning Mister Blue, we've got our eyes on you.
The evidence is clear, that you've been scheming.You like to steal away and while away the day.
You like to spend an hour dreaming.
What will it take, to whip you into line?
A broken heart?
A broken head?
It can be arranged.
It can be arranged.

Step softly Mister Blue, we know what's best for you.
We know where your precious dreams will take you.
You've got a slot to fill, and fill that slot you will.
You'll learn to love it, or we'll break you.
Oh, what will it take, to whip you into line?
A broken heart?
A broken head?
It can be arranged.
It can be arranged.

Be careful Mister Blue this phase you're going through,
Can lead you nowhere else, but to disaster.
Excuse us while we grin,
you've worn our patience thin.
It's time to show you who is your master.
What will it take, to whip you into line?
A broken heart?
A broken head?
It can be arranged.
It can be arranged.

Don't worry Mister Blue, we'll take good care of you.
Just think of it as sense and not surrender.
But never think again, that you can think again,
Or you'll get something you'll remember.
What will it take to whip you into line?
A broken heart?
A broken head?
It can be arranged.
It can be arranged.

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A Man of Suave, and Deboner 



Put this one on the gramaphone, and watch the babes beat a path to your door.

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Sunday, October 19, 2008

Browns suck tonight. New KOTH is on the way. On call was good, ends tomorrow.

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Friday, October 17, 2008

You Can't Say That About The Buckeyes 

Your result for The Horrifying Stereotype Test...

Sports Dick

You Are What You Are


Why can't you understand that the mighty fine accomplishments of your state's sports teams have absolutely nothing to do with you? No matter whether your favorite team wins or loses, you're still a loser. Unless you are big on OSU, in which case you are always a winner.

Take The Horrifying Stereotype Test at HelloQuizzy

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Here's What We Techies Do In Our Spare Time 


Sad.

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Another Nasty Post 

I'm not Joe the Plumber. More like Joe the DBA. But what is happening to him brings up in vivid national exposure what I was trying to get at in my foaming-at-the-mouth post Chicago trip post. He's even conveniently located in one of our Lake Erie hugging liberalshit run counties right here in Ohio. And it helps amply show how I arrive at my foaming-at-the-mouth head-for-the hills-or-at-least-the-nearest-Red-county point of view.

What is happening to Joe shows in it’s horrible and scary depth the ultimate results of the Left’s turning the personal political. Let it not be forgotten that Sen. Obama came to Joe’s house, and Joe did not seek out the Senator. Sen. Obama was on Joe's personal property. Yet it is the private citizen who’s life is being ruined for simply disagreeing with one candidate for President.

This is the pattern of exposure to liberals. Disagreement is taken as hostility and even assult. Agreement or neutrality is taken as assent to their whole manure cart of bullshit ideas: pacifism, third-worldies, and vegetarianism. In most cases it’s not a public or life ruining matter, but with just one accusation about taxes, bad parenting, code violations, or other matters that have not been decided in a court of law under our Constitution, a simple disagreement turns into a near criminal procuedure.

This is creepy, but when dealing with the liberal in your personal life you’d better be ready to back up your opinion with lawyers, at least. Otherwise it is better to avoid this group of people.

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Thursday, October 16, 2008

This one's for you, Erica. Sounds like you could use it.

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Tuesday, October 14, 2008


The last rose of the year. Probably. I'd make a crack about This Bud's For You, but it's not 'cause I'm on call now. Damn.

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Monday, October 13, 2008

Ladies, you may want to skip this post because as always, Captain SQL may be too much man for you to handle. Wrapped up declogging the bathtub drain today, AND painting what remained of the kitchen too. I rule. It's Hank Hillicious! I am too good to be true!

Speaking of the old Arlen running back, I saw The Express this weekend. Peeps, this may indeed be the best football movie ever, contending with We Are Marshall. Truly an inspiring and tragic story. Jim Brown, living legend and God of Cleveland Football was a consultant on it. Jim deserves that living legend status and the movie having sent me back to the Syracuse record books, he stands even taller than ever for all of his accomplishments. See this one, please. A few minor concessions to drama were made, the most glaring one being the non-presence of Paul Brown and unexplained presence of comic-like Art Modell before he actually was in Cleveland. That one is easy. Paul Brown and Jim Brown and Ernie Davis in the same cinematic universe at the same time is just too much to handle. Each needs his own masterpiece film, and the three together would fill the enitre day.

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Sunday, October 12, 2008

Really Good Movies! 

My secretary, Loraine Carnegie got this message from her. It said bring the file with you and meet me on the East Side of the Flats at the Columbus Street Bridge, 3:00 AM tomorrow. I knew what was up. Foul Play, and it was no good to boot.

Your result for Noir Knowlege Trivia...

Resident of Noir City

Hardboiled Smarts


You live on the dark, wet streets of Noir City. You know every twist, turn and back alley. You might want to make break for it. The horizon's just ahead and it's got a name - Justice.

Take Noir Knowlege Trivia at HelloQuizzy

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Your result for How good of a Calvinball player are you?...

Your Grade= A- Good Calvinball knowledge and strategy

63% Game_Knowledge and 80% Game_Skill!


Well done! You are part of the 8.7% of the population that landed in this category.* You placed very well in both knowledge of the game and skill.


You probably have a natural talent in Calvinball and you are clearly no dummy. It seems that you have learned that the trick to doing well in Calvinball is not brute strength, but quick wit. With your natural ability you could go far.


There is however still some room for improvement. You are probably already talented enough to beat Calvin, but it will take some more work before you could defeat the quick-witted Hobbes. Keep reading and practicing, and one day you'll be able to take that tiger down.


* This is a made up number.

Take How good of a Calvinball player are you? at HelloQuizzy


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In the midst of a long 5 day weekend, then on-call starts Tuesday, over most of these stations. And enjoying every minute of it. The weekend, not on-call. The Captain SQL index of babe magnitude seems to be on the upswing, for mysterious reasons known only to the female segments of our population. No man can ever understand why, or when. OSU pulls one out of it's ass yesterday. Hey guys, how's 'bout some offense? The Browns give us a break today from further inoffensive football, so I'm going to take in The Express, about the greatest Browns Running Back that never played for us. All I know about Ernie Davis is what I read, and much of that is what Jim Brown has said. And if Jim Brown said it, you'd better believe it.

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Saturday, October 11, 2008

It's About Damn Time! 

OK lady, nobody needs to see that.

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Texas 45
Oklahoma 35

What a shootout! Forget the post before the last. Maybe I'll just move to Arlen.

Also of note:
Michigan 10
Holy Toledo 13

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Friday, October 10, 2008

Equal Time 

I realize the last post may have seemed harsh to some. So following the CaptainSQL Fairness Doctrine, here is equal time for my former wife.

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Thursday, October 09, 2008

Yom Kippur is now over. I haven’t been much with the spirit of the holidays. The week has been a wreck. My daughter has been with me, going through college applications, dependent on transportation, and with her mom in the hospital. I do not like to get together with her mother. The ex’s friends are assholes. I do not want to talk to these people or even greet them. All of this has taken up gobs of time. Was exhausted yesterday, and did a lot of sleeping today.

There is also Residual Weekend Kumbiyah Resentment(TM). During the waking, non-worship time last weekend there was a lot of leftist yapping and sharing of unwanted opinions. I received shit when I said that I might want to move to an adjacent county. This is not a move far away. I could enjoy the rapidly vanishing amenities of Cleveland without having to put up with the growing negative features. Adjacent counties are more normal and less blue. That reaction adds to the attractiveness of such a move.

Make no mistake about it. I have a finite number of months left to pay child support. I look forward to its termination. After then I can move to another job, or another career without regard to income, the same as any free American, and not be subject to prosecution if my income drops. I look forward to that day. Also with the end of custody for my daughter I can live outside of Cuyahoga County without the threat of losing my time with her. I will be happy also to stop feeding self propelled garbage in black robes here, such as Judge Christine McMonagle, with my tax dollars.

Keep blogging, gang. Take it from Kumbiyah HQ on the North Coast, you need to express yourself as often and vividly as possible. The great Acidman led the way, exposing all to the Divorce Court BS he had, and it served as a warning to others including me. I doubt a President Hussein would be as bad as many fear and as he desires but it is important to leave a trail of bread crumbs letting others know your opinion. Because he’d shut you up if he ever could.

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Tuesday, October 07, 2008




You Should Live in North Dakota


If you don't want to live in North Dakota, you might also consider:



Kansas

Missouri

North Carolina

Oregon

What State Should You Live In?

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Monday, October 06, 2008

Just Because 


I'm still fed up with the weekend Kumbiyah.

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Sunday, October 05, 2008

Final Kumbiyah tally from the weekend: irritating but manageable. Someone's gonna get a nice contribution, and it ain't the Holdahand Kumbiyah foundation. Anyway, yes there was a lot of spouting of opinion, no I don't care for the spouters nor does it make a damn bit of difference in the way I vote, eat, read, drink, bathe, sleep or reorganize indexes. The ex went into the hospital the day before I took off leading to some stress but the kid was OK. OSU won. Yay! If she stays in state the school of preference in Miami, so yes, I would like some cheese with that MAC.


The reception festivities were in a sports bar filled by rabid Cubs fans. That was the in-law side of the group, which was entirely OK, if not my team O'choice. And don't forget guys, there's always next century. My relatives were the major providers of Kumbiyah. In fact, it was like having a severely defective cable plan. One channel would be ESPN, one would be bullshit PBS documentaries about dyspeptic alpacas and why it's All Bush's Fault (TM). Oh, also one of my more distant, but entertaining relatives has plenty of improbable stories, so we gotta throw in the LuAnn Platter Channel.

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Friday, October 03, 2008

A couple of hours before I shove off for Chicago. Those Cubs have got to get on the ball and start winning! My daughter will be here, her mom in hospital again. Getting very wary about any shenanigans her mom will pull while I'm away. I'll be out 1 day and the kid should be fine. It's been a crazy house here with her filling out college applications. My nephew's Bar Mitzvah should be fine. The Rabbi here kept Kum-Bi-Ya off the Bimah, as it should be. My relatives are another planet story altogether. Some are phyically unable to get through a simple conversation or phone call without spouting off about respect for third world cultures, or vegetarianism, or pacifism, or some other nonsense. I'm sure they'll pipe up at the festivities. My plan, button it up and contribute more to good causes, such as the USO.


Cleveland Browns fans get a break this week, with a bye. Lunch tomorrow will be Michigan, served up to The Illini, as I watch and try to block out the big, steaming heaps of Kum-Bi-Ya. Then I load onto a plane for the rest of the weekend.

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